It is what it is...

I was really trying to write something about gratitude, given the Thanksgiving holiday approaching, but instead I am writing about acceptance.

I was at a therapy session recently and I was talking about my guilt and all of my "What ifs" and my therapist said to me, "One of the most powerful things that you can tell yourself is, It is, what it is. Living in the past won't change it, and beating yourself up won't change it, so you have to accept what it is."

I can sometimes spend hours thinking about what would have happened if Mateo didn't die. What he would look like now, at almost 6 months old. What he would sound like, what color his eyes would be. It makes me very sad when I go down that road, and this saying has helped me with that.

It doesn't take away my sadness, but it does help me to stay in the now. So when I start to travel the road of "What ifs", I just tell myself, "Cerise, it is what it is, it has already happened, it can't be changed".

Now, I have also learned how to do this in other areas of my life, my mistakes of the past, the hurts that others have caused, and the friendships that have come and gone. It reminds me that all I really have is this moment. So, I must make the best of it. So, in a way, I guess this post has something to do with gratitude.

Namaste