It has been a long time since I have written here...things have changed so much. We now have two little boys who take up a lot of time and attention, but wouldn't have it any other way. We are so blessed and have so much to be thankful for, and even with everything going on, I still think of you every day.

Yes, on the outside I seem to have moved on, I smile, I laugh...I even joke around. I am happy, and joyful...and yet there is still a hole inside. I still steal away at least once a day to cry...tears still roll down my face when I hear your name, even if it is given to another child. I still wish things were different, and think about what life would be like if you were here with us.

Oh, it would be busy! A 5 year old, a 18 month old, and twin 5 month olds...but it would be amazing to hear your voice, to watch you walking around and see your precious smile...To cuddle with you during movies, and sing to you as you fall asleep.

This is the second Christmas without you, I can't believe time has passed so quickly...it feels like just yesterday we had to say goodbye. I can still feel your little fingers on my thumb, and I can still smell the sweetness of your hair. I wish I could kiss you again and again and again. I wish that I could hold you again and whisper "I Love you" into your ear. I want you to know that I think of you every time I kiss the boys, every time I hold them...I kiss them extra for you.

Yes, things may look normal around here...but nothing is ever "normal" for an angel mommy. There is always one piece of her that is waiting for here somewhere else. I love you precious angel of mine...I love you always and forever...